5. Library of Fear

The Matrix as a collection of stories with gripping hooks.

Blog Overview: Hooking into the Matrix // New Rules // Choosing Truth

"We are all wading in a swimming pool of shit and urine," so a Krishna elder constantly reminds me, "and all we want is to find refuge."

We want to go home and leave this delusional Matrix in the dust. But for some reason, we are still here contemplating the meaning of our lives while living in it, validating it. Even the greatest philosophers, from Plato to Confucius questioned existence, thereby enhancing perspective and affording humans acting on autopilot an opportunity to escape the enslavement of their programmed beliefs by using intelligence (Light) to commune with Spirit. But even those great Minds were mortal and died, not fully realized.

So why is it that we cannot escape?

Why have we yet expanded our consciousness to unite with Spirit, with God, after so many incarnations, so many lifetimes as humans?

Planet Earth is riddled with demons. There is a literal Matrix overlaid that feeds off of fear, bolstered by those who are too scared to trust that they have the ability to escape it. Maybe we think it’s warm in Hell or simply normalize addiction to suffering?

Many of you reading this are likely thinking, oh shit, this woman needs help! Quick, call her parents and get an intervention team together. She’s hell-bent on compromising the current systems in place. Pull her back in! Convince her that all is well, that it’s comfortable enough here on Earth. Give her a joint and tell her to relax.

To put it bluntly, that’s your ego talking. I’m compromising your delusional beliefs that says one can experience their “birthright” to pleasure, bliss, abundance, and joy in the Matrix.

That’s bullshit.

You cannot be a truly fulfilled Being when functioning in the energetics of the illusion. Sure, you can find temporary relief, but in reality, you’re covering up a really deep sadness.

It’s like putting a Band-Aid on a gaping wound and feigning a smile. The blood is still gushing. Your smile is fake. And you’re going to continue to face the sword that slashed you over and over again until you remember that the sword is an illusion.

You see, we keep playing games with the Matrix. Whenever we are playing by their rules, we are going to lose. So, we have to change the rules. We have to incinerate delusion with our light-sabers, with our dragon allies, with a rose, what have you, and finally let go of what we think is true. We must absolve agreements that place limitations on existence. After all, we are infinite, so why play so small? Why settle for the conditions you’ve placed on reality?? Does it really help you feel safe and secure, or is that the little voice in your head that never shuts up?

Thing is, we know what we know and that’s it.

….Until our Higher Selves orchestrate an initiation and deem us prepared to abandon old, unserving habits (belief systems) for a much more fulfilling and truer conceptualization of God. Bit by bit, we open our eyes.

Remember, a baby does not leave the womb walking and talking. There are stages to the evolution. If our Higher Selves were to offer us all the keycodes at once, we would literally explode, so the Pleiadeans explain in a channeled novel by Barbara Marciniak called “Bringers of the Dawn”.

Those on a spiritual path (who aren’t bypassing) have to analyze the ways they get hooked back into the Matrix. Let's explore a visual to innerstand the nuances of these hooks and why they seem so compelling.

Every novel begins with a hook. They catch the reader’s attention and get them asking a question. Make ‘em beg for more. Keep 'em turning the pages. Draw 'em into the world with a burning desire to know more.

Now, imagine life as a personal library slammed packed with your most treasured books. The lighting is great, there are so many comfortable couches to snuggle into your book, and the tea stations is world-class. There’s not a single speck of dust on any surface and the marble columns remind you of your importance. Everything within this library carries this frequency, from the setting to the words on the pages.

In other words, you’re more than content, convinced you’ve found Heaven. There are unlimited books to choose from, each with an incredible hook, so you’re feeling infinite with choice.

Remember, this is your life. So, every time you enter a new body, it’s like taking a new book off the shelf and playing the role of the protagonist, antagonist, narrator, etc. You are the book and the library and the person reading the book.

And you’re sooo hooked! The story is engrossing and you devour chapter after chapter until one day you die (finish the story), return the book, and take a new one off the library shelf. This story has a new title with different characters, but the underlying energetics are the exact same. Again, you’re hooked, you flip page after page, and one day death claims another book, another incarnation.

This library is the Matrix. As a constituent of the library, the curator of stories and creator of your experiment, you put on new identities and convince yourself that the worlds in the books are all that exist.

In truth, the library is a delusional spiral. All those stories hook you into a role and convince you that the words on the pages are your source of power since YOU are the one choosing which books to read.

Guess who is actually in charge of the library?

It’s simple.

It’s an energy.

It’s fear.

Fear says that the library contains all of existence.

In reality, this library is filled with stories that hook you into illusion. Every single one of the books is riddled with fear and you get off to them. You’re so attached to that library card because you think that one of the books (one of your incarnations) will finally offer reprieve. But remember, all these books have the exact same energy, but simply take on a new title.

Little do you know that this library is the darkest place in all the Universes. You’re just unwilling to consider that anything exists beyond it.

In reality, we either:

A) choose to keep hooking into the library of illusion (aka identifying with stories and attachments to our Mind and Body)

OR

B) choose to commune with Spirit (aka infinite Love and Light).

If you still have a Body and are reading this, you’re still choosing Option A. And that’s okay! As much as I want to convince myself I’m fully embodying Option B, I still have these desires that keep me looping into stories, and have yet to find sanctuary because I’m still functioning on the energetics of the Matrix.

But I know that my true self chooses Option B.

And I trust I will one day disassociate from my thoughts and the functions of the ego that cause me to be so attached to (lowercase) will. The energetics of (lowercase) will is appealing because it’s "safe"…it’s what I know. It props up my inner-world because what we believe as true is reflected to us in our outer worlds. I have yet, for example, learned to fly or transform into a dragon because I’m so convinced of the limitations I place on the human experience.

By the way, this is also the mechanics of “manifesting”, a shallower and untrue version of sovereignty. That’s just giving more power to illusion. We think we know what we want, but as soon as we "manifest" it, we realize we’re still not satisfied. Nothing outside of us will make us happy because we are still in the illusion even if we are “manifesting”.

Let me ask you a few questions:

Is it really safer to believe your stories than to accept that you’ve settled for a delusional limitation of reality?

Do you really get off on being “right” so much that you’d spit in the face of Truth?

Can you not humble yourself a bit more?

Would you be willing to say you’re wrong and consider another perspective in order to come back to the Light?

I’m not going to say that it’s easy (because FEAR is one sneaky fucker), but it sure does get easier!

I am willing to surrender to (uppercase) Will, the Will of Spirit. I am willing to humble myself in moments of conviction, especially when I swear by the constraints of space and time, seemingly unable to widen my perspective with consideration for the miraculous multidimensional energetics of God. When I’m caught in the illusion, may I have the grace to leave the story. May I, even for a brief moment, step out of the stories of the fearsome library and be with the infinite grace of Love and Light.

........

As soon as I think I’ve got it all figured out, I go back to the basics. Complexity is simplicity’s counterpart. You cannot have one without the other. Remember this when contemplating “simple” truths. Often you get a whiff of the truth, but can hardly get a taste, let alone a bite, not to mention a full meal.

As for now, I am still with my Body and Mind. So, I go back to the drawing board and do my very best to understand the basics, back to simple truths like…

“I am responsible for what I see. I choose the feelings I experience, and I decide upon the goal I would achieve. And everything that seems to happen to me I ask for and receive as I have asked.” (pg. 17)

“Perception is a mirror, not a fact. And what I look on is my state of mind, reflected outward.” (pg. 29)

“Reality brings only perfect peace. When I am upset, it is always because I have replaced reality with illusions I made up.” (pg. 35)

“How deceived was I to think that what I feared was in the world, instead of in my mind.” (pg. 62)

Quotes above from: Accept this Gift – Selections from A Course in Miracles

As always, peace be with us.

Love, your friend, Riddlez

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